My Thermostat, My Enemy

I'm not a cold-natured person. I have nice coats that I never wear, even on the coldest of days. I have nice sweaters that I never wear. My house is not toasty- I hate what gas heat does to my skin and my sinuses.

That being said, I received my gas bill today and almost cried: $368. No past due balance included-- just 30 days worth of gas! My house is drafty, my furnace is a dinasaur, but oh my God!!!! The gas company checked my house for leaks a few months ago and found none. I guess I could call customer service and talk to Janice again, but what good would that do? She'd probably suggest I hire another independent contrator to build me an igloo, or invest in parkas and long johns.

I think I could find better use of this money. A 30 day supply of gas equals:

• 122.66 bottles of beer at the Corner Tavern
• 52.58 pitchers of beer at Flashback
• 1 car payment
• 1/2 mortgage payment
• 1 months Cell Phone/Satellite TV/ DSL/Power/Water/Sewage/Car Insurance
• 1 year supply of dog food for 4 dogs
• 168 gallons of gas
• 36 visits to the movies, including popcorn and coke
• a round trip ticket to about anywhere in the USA, Mexico or Canada
• 994 first class postage stamps

Oh well, it's just money but look at how much fun I could've had. Now I'm motivated to just turn the thermostat off and spend the next month at the Corner Tavern. I'd actually save money by not staying home.