Daily thoughts by a guy that doesn't like to think deeply too often!

Friday, October 23, 2009

Happy Anniversary to US!

I can't believe that it's been a year since Michael and I headed West to get married! This time last year, we were checking into the Roosevelt Hotel in LA. We got a free upgrade to a luxury hotel room, overlooking Hollywood Blvd. Our wedding ceremony was held the following day-- shortly after we had our picture taken with a couple of Marilyn Monroe impersonators outside the Chinese Theater. The ceremony was very simple-- money was tight and we couldn't afford the cliff side or beach ceremony. We opted for the wedding chapel venue. It was just the two of us, a Pastor and the world's worst photographer. There was ONE invited guest-- my former roommate, Christian. He was a no show & later claimed that he was sick.

The wedding chapel was as tacky as I expected. We stood with the Pastor under an indoor trellis covered in silk pink roses. We told the Pastor that we had written our own vows, but he ignored that request and went on with the ceremony as usual using prewritten vows. The vows we spoke to each other were probably better in hindsight.. they were dead on, and both of us cried as we attempted to repeat them. It was a totally moving ceremony, but we both regretted that we didn't get to say the things that we had spent weeks working on. We did read our personal vows to each other on the way to the car, and we ended up crying again and holding each other in the wedding chapel parking lot.

After the ceremony, we headed to Redondo Beach. We walked the pier and stopped for a drink in the local tavern. We watched the sun set over the ocean and relished in the fact that we were legally married. Just as legal as our parents had been. Who would have known that we were one of the last gay couple that could enjoy this right? A month later, gay marriages were outlawed due to Prop 8. Our marriage status was in limbo for the next several months. Sometime around February or March it was announced that marriages performed prior to November 3rd, 2008 were grandfathered in-- our marriage was still valid!

Since then, life has been a rocky road. Both of our work situations changed, money is tighter than ever and the "happily -ever-after" dream I had of marriage hasn't panned out. It's been a year, and we've settled into our roles as husbands and fathers (did I mention that we are raising a baby?). In the past year, we've gone through the "richer or poorer, sickness and in health" routine. Everything bad has been thrown at us, but we're still together and things are getting better. I'd walk through fire for that man, and I know he'd do the same for me. We are a family-- as strange as it may sound.

Happy Anniversary, Baby. I warned you that this was a life sentence with no chance of parole, and I meant it! Thank you for always being there for me, for encouraging me and supporting me. You are my knight in shining armor and I love you! I look forward to growing old with you and continuing to love you to the nth degree!

Below are the vows that we personally wrote to each other. Enjoy a private look at our inner-most thoughts:

Michael's vow to me:
It has been written that love is its own country that the world invades. It has also been written to love someone is to fly with the angels and if you are lucky your hands and hearts are connected, your body, you soul. I can only thank God that I have been able find the one person with whom all of this becomes manifest.
Brian, before you came into my life I was very much adrift. Now, I find a complement to my strength, am enhancement where I am weak. And, I am very blessed to do the same in return and have you love me…in return.
Brian, I pledge that you will always have my love. That you will always have me to lean upon and me upon you, our love is and always will be complete and perpetual.
This I promise today, tomorrow, and always.


My vow to Michael:
I, Brian, choose you, Michael, to be my soul mate and husband. In sickness, I will nurse you back to health. In health, I will encourage you on your path. In sadness, I will help you to remember. In happiness, I will be there to make memories with you. In poverty, I will do all that I can to make our love rich. And in wealth, I will never let our love grow poor.

When you need someone to talk to, I will be there for you. When you need a helping hand, you’ve got mine. When you need someone to laugh with, turn to me.

I promise to you a life time of happiness and I am so grateful to God that you entered my life.

Through the good and the bad, I will be beside you to protect you and love you as long as we both shall live.


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