Wedding Gifts

(If you haven't already read the wedding annoucement below, you might want to read that first)


Lo Lo and Travis finally finished opening their gifts today and they wanted me to pass on their sincere thanks. "I feel like a millionaire! I'm going to have to do a lot of rearranging in the trailer to make room for all of these fine gifts!!!!", said Lo Lo.

Among their favorite gifts are:

Beverly and Melisha Manchaser gave the happy couple a 12 pack of Miller Lite. Unfortunately, Lo Lo spotted it on the gift table prior to the wedding and she snuck it back into the dressing room. "I needed a little liquid courage before I go through with this wedding nonsense!", she said. She also asked that no one tell Travis that she and the bridesmaids finished off this gift-- he doesn't need to know about it.

Another favorite gift was this inspirational "Jesus Playing Football" ceramic figurine, given by Lo Lo's Aunt Ida. "That's something you don't see every day", said Travis, "some little kid trying to tackle our Lord and Savior. There's just something wrong about that, but Lo Lo seems to like it for some reason. Thanks, Aunt Ida".

They also received an anatomically correct ceramic lung ashtray from their neighbor in the trailer park, Francine Laudermilk. "Travis is going to have a hard time filling that sucker up with butts, but I'll help", commented Lo Lo.

Here's a picture of Aunt Louanne and Uncle Buford playing with the Bedpan Banjo they brought as their gift to the reception. "Not only is it pretty, but it's practical, too! Just think of all those times that you have a gig that's not anywheres near a port-a-potty. This think will come in handy! I gauran-damn-tee it", said Aunt Louanne.

Travis's favorite gift was the Tiki Tissue Dispenser, given to him by his bossman, Ernie Sykes. "It'll look great in our trailer-- I wonder if they sell yellow or green tissue paper? I'll have to get Lo Lo to pick some up-- that'd look a lot more lifelike than white."