Daily thoughts by a guy that doesn't like to think deeply too often!

Monday, October 31, 2005

Home Improvement

This weekend I devoted an entire day to my house. I worked on the sunroom-- cleaning and painting. I found some suede paint at Lowe's and picked a color similar to the one I have in my bedroom. The pictures make it look bright red, but it's really a terra-cotta color with a little red tint to it-- it's called Cheyenne Red. The walls are finished, but I still need to repaint all of the trim. I hope to finish it up next weekend and move on to another room! Below is one "before" picture and a few "after" pictures. Hope you like it!

More Dog Shots

A couple of good pics I took of King this weekend:

A couple of shots of King's sister, Lady. She stayed with us three nights this week:

And one picture of the two of them together, sharing secrets:

Happy Halloween!

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Turn-about Interview

Bruce was nice enough to answer my questions a few days ago in his birthday interview. He requested an interview with me in exchange, so here goes Interview II; this time Bruce is asking the questions:
*Who influenced you the most to try out for drag?
No one really had to talk me into it. It was something that I always wanted to try. I grew up in the 80's and loved going to the drag bars. I looked at the "girls" as celebrities, and felt important just being around them. I was jeaous of the guys that could fix themselves up and look so much like women, and their ability to go out there and entertain the crowds at the risk of making themselves look like a fool. I always felt so much respect for the queens that they would take such a leap into the unkown and get applause, and tips, for it.
*Did you ever dress in drag before you appeared on stage?
Only on Halloween-- when I was about 6 years old I dressed up in my grandmother's dress and my mother's wig. Somewhere there is a picture of me at that age, sitting on a bean bag chair wearing a red, white & blue skirt, a white blouse, and a brunette wig-- crossing my legs like a real woman and even holding a cigarette. It's the gayest picture ever taken of me!
At the age of 10, I went trick-or-treating, dressed as Farrah Fawcett (she was all the rage that year!).
*What are your favorite songs/artists that you like to perform?
I usually do Top 40 kind of songs-- the latest hits. Usually they are fast numbers with some dancing. I've learned that my alter-ego, Keisha, can dance a lot better than I can.
*Is there a song that you are practicing now,that you would like to perform?
I'm not practicing anything right now since there are no shows planned til next Summer. But-- I am thinking about it and collecting possible songs. Last night I heard Blondie's "One Way or Another" on the jukebox and wrote it down on the list as a possible/maybe.
*Did you hate gym class, but love the locker room?
Actually, I don't remember my school having a locker room. I only took one PE class in high school and that was track. I loved to run, and I was pretty fast. But, I don't remember going to the locker room and changing into shorts, or showering afterwards. That was so long ago, or maybe I blocked it out!
*What's in the future for Keisha Lorraine?
At times I feel like letting Keisha go, but I know I can't. I enjoy the spotlight and the crowd too much. I love having an alter-ego that can say what she thinks. She's the total opposite of me. She'll probably be wowing the crowd in a wheelchair someday.
*Tell me about the best present you have ever received?
I've received lots of great presents in my life, but the two that stand out both came from Steve, about 15 years ago. I had just bought a big aquarium and wanted it to be a saltwater tank. I got the tank set up and bought a few cheap fish for it. On the morning of my birthday, I went to feed the fish and found that the aquarium had new residents. I had some seahorses, anenomies, blowfish and a butterfly fish.
The other "best present" was just a note. I was getting ready to put the Christmas tree up one year and among the decorations I found an envelope. I opened it and found the note: "I hope we're still together next Christmas. I love you", dated the previous January when we had taken the tree down. Of course we WERE still together, otherwise it would've been a terrible gift!
*Is there any type of drag you don't like to see or do?
I enjoy all kinds of drag, but I really don't like watching drag queens that have beards. I never understood that one. I can enjoy camp drag, I just don't want to be campy myself.
*Does your family know about Keisha? And if so how do they feel?
Most of my family don't know about Keisha. My older brother does- he's seen pictures of her, but hasn't met her yet. But~~~ I saw him perform in drag as Annie Lennox about 10 years ago! I'm not ashamed of Keisha, but I don't think Keisha would do the same act if my mother and brothers were in the audience.
*When you are going to perform for a show, how many hours of rehersal do you do?
Hours??? More like months! I don't want to make a fool of myself! I learn the words and practice the moves for months, but the dance steps always change as soon as I hit the real stage and the music starts.
*Have you ever gotten stage fright?
Not at all. I always feel quesy and scatter-brained the day of the show, but once I'm in costume, I'm fine.
*When you're Keisha Lorraine do you ever think about Brian Burnett?
Not much. It's hard to explain, but when I put on the wig and make-up, it's like wearing a mask. I become Keisha and I can say or do whatever I want. I don't think about Brian, or worry about unpaid bills, etc. It's like wearing the Mickey Mouse costume at Disneyworld-- you can walk around and shake hands and hug and dance & believe that you are a character; someone else for a short period of time. Keisha doesn't want to think about Brian- she wants the party to continue and the show to go on. It's very liberating and amazing. A forty year old man feels like the queen of the ball- take the costume off and he's back to being a 9 to 5 bookkeeper.

Lynn, Bruce & Willie

Here are some pics of my friends Lynn and Bruce, posing with Rick & John's baby, Willie, at Bruce's birthday party last weekend:

Dog Shots!

King & Cletus looking guilty after a night of removing the stuffing from their blanket:
My sweet, Betty~ the matriarch of the pack:

Shelby~~ my little teddy bear:

Sunday, October 23, 2005

Birthday Interview with Melisha

Today is one of my very best friend's birthday. A milestone one, at that! He's 50 years old today-- half a century/ 5 decades/ 18,250 days! In honor of his birthday, I wanted to interview him for my Blog and find out some of the things I've always wanted to know about him and his alter ego, Melisha Manchaser. Bruce has performed as Melisha for decades and he's the most famous drag queen that I can truly call a friend. I've had lots of drag queen friends in my life, but Bruce impresses me more than any of the others, and continues to wow me every time I see him perform. We're friends off stage, and sisters on stage. He's a role model to me in many ways. Happy Birthday, Bruce! Now, on with the interview:

* Did you ever dress in drag before you appeared on stage?
Yes when I was young I use to play house with my two sisters and I was always the mother. Got caught one time and my mother spanked me so I just learned to use better padding. Then of course always on halloween, it always gave the little country boys a hoot!

* How old were you the first time you did drag for an audience?
Maybe not the type of audience you were referring to but when I was 16. I was Mrs. Clause in our church every third Sunday to raise money for the young people to be able to do things. Also that is where I learned real fast how to sit like a lady in church. That in itself is a whole different story. But I so did love the youth pastor after that!

* Who was your biggest tipper-- does anyone stand out?
My biggest tipper was to be my first lover, Jarold Brady. At the time he was the owner of a bar in Chicago. I went there for talent night and that same night he tipped me the most I have ever been tipped.

* What are your favorite songs/artists that you like to perform?
I can't say I have any one favorite of songs/artists. Of course when I was young, if they was popular and fast then I did it. Now that I am a grandmother of 5, a lot slower is perferred.

* Did you have an arch-enemy drag queen?
I really don't want to say, I am to old to run fast and the bitch would hunt me down and hang me by my garter belt.

* Is there a song that you haven't performed yet, but always wanted to?
Yes," Rock This Country" by Shania Twain

* Has any member of your immediate family ever seen you perform on stage, or in drag?
All of my immediate family has seen me at one time or another.

* Describe your favorite drag costume.
I really don't have one that I can remember that really sticks out to be a favorite. Unless it could be the one that I did "Strong Enough",by Cher. I can say I showed my ass in that!

* Do you prefer to have back up dancers, or do you like to perform alone?
I really love my boys. Lately I don't think I could've performed without them being able to help hide my flaws in the movement of the steps.

* Tell me about the best christmas present/birthday gift that you ever received
Christmas, it would of been the jeep that my second lover brought me. Birthday, God I have had so many I can't remember all of the gifts. But one that I love was just given to me by you. It's made by Arsenic & Apple Pie. It's a drag queen doll. Limited Edition of course!.

* What's in the future for Melisha Manchaser?
I think before long I will be packing things back up, if I can just stay off of e-bay and buying every sequin that I can fine!

If you don't take anything else away from here, just remember-" Officer I know my rights, I'm entitled to a phone call and a strip search."

Thursday, October 20, 2005

King & Queen of East Point 2005

East Point, GA. The winners of the "East Point King & Queen 2005" contest were announced today and the award goes to Mr. Billy Bob Johnson and Ms. Keisha Lorraine. These socialites campaigned hard for the title, spending endless nights at the Corner Tavern and Flashback. Ms. Lorraine can often be found upstairs at the Tavern, dancing in front of the jukebox and accepting tips and free drinks, while Mr. Johnson is downstairs at Flashback wowing the kareoke crowd with his rendition of Jimmy Buffet's "Why Don't We Get Drunk & Screw", and "Boot Scoot Boogie".
According to Ms. Lorraine, they met at Hooter's (where she is currently employed, part time). "He came in and sat right down in one of my booths. He smiled at me and my heart went pitter-pat. I hadn't seen a man with a full set of teeth in years. I guess that's what I was attracted to the most- he had teeth!", said Lorraine.
Ms. Lorraine and Mr. Johnson (currently unemployed) appeared on the Jerry Springer show earlier this year. Johnson surprised his fiance (or as he says "financee") by announcing that he was having affairs with Keisha's mother, aunt, cousin and brother. There was a lot of foul language and chair throwing, but by the end of the episode the couple made up (after the results of the paternity and HIV tests were revealed).
Lorraine has numerous awards under her belt (Miss Newman's Recycling Center 2003, Miss Washington Road Seafood & Soulfood Cafe 2004, Orrion Farm's "Queen of the Ball" rodeo 2005 & Miss Galaxy Grocery 2005), but she still says that meeting Billy Bob was the best award she's ever received. "I try not to get a big head; I just want to be treated like anyone else."
The wedding is planned to occur in the early Spring of 2014; "Unless someone better comes along!", jokes Johnson.
Congratulations to the happy couple. We wish them years of happiness.


My new dream man is Kaya~~ he's famous for being on "Temptation Island". He had his 15 minutes of fame 10 years ago, but I didn't notice him back then. I recently saw him on celebrity versions of "The Weakest Link" and "Dog Eat Dog" on the Game Show Network. I wonder what ever happened to him-- what a hunk!

Monday, October 17, 2005

King's Halloween Costume

Seperated at Birth?

Sunday, October 16, 2005

Halloween Hat Hootenanny (H3)

The H3 party was so much fun last night. Rick and John really know how to throw a party! There was lots of great food and plenty of free booze (the best kind!). There was even a hat contest and real trophies were given out in several different categories. My sister, Melisha, won the award for the biggest hat-- I know there's a "size queen" joke in here somewhere, but I'm still recovering so I'll have to think on that one and get back to you!
My photo site will be updated later today. Notice that I've added a link to the East Point Possums Photo Site, too. There you can find lots of great pictures from last weeks drag show benefitting the hurrican relief effort.

Saturday, October 15, 2005


I didn't get a chance to Blog yesterday- wow, what a busy day that was!
I had to get up at 4am in order to get to work early enough to get 2 catering orders together and delivered by 7am. Then I was invited to go to a Marketing meeting off site. On the way to the meeting, Delia took John and me out to lunch at a Thai restaurant on 14th-- I forgot the name, but I think it started with a T. Afterwards, we spent about 2 hours planning some advertising and marketing strategies for the upcoming holiday season. The 4th quarter is always our slowest, so we're trying to figure out some new ways to increase business. I've been doing all of the marketing for the past year, but this was the first time that I really felt that my opinion mattered- the first time I really felt like a Manager at work!
I thought that since I had gone into work so early that I'd be out of there by 3pm, but it didn't happen. I've got two huge catering jobs this week- one tomorrow morning and one on Tuesday, so I had a lot of work to do finalizing those plans. I didn't get to leave til about 5pm, and even my ride home was taken up talking on the phone to Southern Voice getting an ad together for next weeks paper.
At 6pm I went to Flashback for our usual kareoke fun. Our friend Lesley (famous KJ at other clubs around town) joined us and brought lots of new music. Also in attendance were Beverly, Bruce, Lynn, Matt, Dustin, Barbara, Ann, Sharon, Lucious, Marvin and Kevin. I only got to sing 1 song "Why Don't We Get Drunk and Screw", by Jimmy Buffet. The crowd seemed to like it. It's a cute song, but I wasn't sure how it would go over. Lesley, Kitty, Marvin and a new guy named "Mr. Smooth" sang lots of songs and they were all incredible. I think the bar has been raised-- besides my feeble attempts to sing, everyone else was great and it was more of a concert than an amateur spotlight thing. There's a lot of talent here in East Point!
Tonight is the Hat Hootenanny at Rick and John's house. It's an annual event that the city really looks forward to every year. It's like an early Halloween party, although costumes are not required. However, hats are! Everyone must wear a hat, and people come up with the wildest hats. I usually just wear a baseball cap, or something like that, and it's acceptable. This year I'm taking up just 1 notch.
I'll update My Photo Site (linked here in my favorites) tomorrow with pictures from last weeks drag show, last night's kareoke party and tonight's Hat Hootenanny. Be sure to check back!

Friday, October 14, 2005

Drag Life of Brian

That's me on the far left, at last weekend's hurricane relief benefit show. Not a great picture of me, but the only one I have so far.

Daphne (front and center in the picture) wrote a Blog about the East Point show- here's an excerpt:

"The Jenkins clan arrived early to help whip the girls into shape. At first there were a few protests as Alexandria Martin, Momma Dale, and Dana started applying layers of base and wild false eyelashes. I assured the lovely Keisha Lorraine that she did, in fact, possess oodles of natural beauty. However, I explained that once we added the necessary unnatural elements, it would take her to a whole new level of exotica. Luckily, most of the girls relented as the photos attest. "

Thanks Jenkins sisters, Alexandria, Dale and Dana for working your magic on me! It certainly was a new level of exotica!

Drag Life of Brian, Part II

New pictures are in--these aren't great, but hopefully I'll receive some better ones soon! Check out those gams!

Thursday, October 13, 2005

A Day at the Biscuit

We have a celebrity "drag queen" hostess working at the restaurant on Wednesday nights. He's worked for us for about 2 months now. It's turned into a nice event, although not overly popular yet. We always have fresh flowers and white linen tablecloths in his honor on Wednesday nights. It all came to an end last night. Here's what happened-- believe me, it's all true-- you can't make this shit up!!!

The owner of the restaurant decided to eat there last night, along with her CFO and his new wife. Before the food even arrived at the table, our "hostess" walked over to the CFO's wife and got right down on her level, all up in her face and asked her where she was from. The wife answered that she was from the Ukraine. The hostess asked "and what have you learned?". The wife didn't know what he was talking about. He remained in her face and began yelling at her: "You're passing off so much negative energy and I don't need this. I'm trying to do my job. You need to get yourself straight. You need to control yourself". Then he walked off, leaving the wife in tears. Shortly afterwards, the couple left and the owner of the restaurant was left alone at the table. The hostess returned and realized that his boss was sitting at the table (I guess he hadn't knoticed that before). You would think that he would've ordered some humble pie, but instead, he lit into her: "I don't need this shit. People coming in here with negative energy. I made this restaurant- I haven't had a chance to go over the books yet, but I know that you wouldn't even be in business if it weren't for me". Then he left.

Later that night he returned. He went into the kitchen and spit a loogie on the floor. On his way out, he grabbed the framed picture of himself off the wall and announced that he was out of there! Too funny!

Unrelated event: later that night, in our other location (my office), a drunk driver caused a huge accident that ended with her car upside down in the intersection and another car crashing through our window and landing in our bakery. No one was hurt, but the two cars were totalled, along with our storefront!

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

Pop Culture

Dream Boy

I had some strange dreams last night. It started off with me and someone I didn't know standing in a field somewhere looking into the sky. The sky looked weird- the clouds were circling in tight bunches. Then we realized that they weren't clouds, but flocks of birds all flying in tight formations. My companion whispered "That's a good omen" in my ear. The next part of the dream was strange too- we were shopping for a house. The house he liked was not my favorite. It had linoleum floors throughout- mostly white with black specks. "He" told me that the floors could be replaced and it'd be incredible. The real estate agent, Teresa Nelson, agreed. The three of us walked into the backyard and it was the same field that I had stood in earlier in the dream. The three of us watched the birds for a while- still forming circles of clouds in the sky. Teresa went to her car to get a "Sold" sign for the front yard. The guy said to me "I told you the birds were a good omen". I said "I love you" and he said "I love you more". I don't remember what the guy in my dream looked like or what his name was; just that wonderful feeling of being in love. I had forgotten how magical that could feel. Just when I was at my happiest, the alarm clock went off and reality slapped me in the face once again.

From Every Direction

Sorry it's been so long since my last post- the "Life of Brian" blog has been down for about a week due to technical difficulties. Let's see, how lud can I scream "I HATE BELLSOUTH!!!!!". I have spent at least 2 hours a day, for the last week, talking to their "help" desk and experiencing the best of customer non-service. I finally got a repairman to come up tonight and fix the problem.
Anyway....... After everything was up and running again, and I was bombarded with so many e-mails, from so may of my friends that were unhappy for one reason or another. They all have valid complaints and I can sympothize with them to a degree. But I can also see the situations from their opponent's point of view as well. I'm stuck in the middle of a few heated battles and I don't like that.
To all of my friends: remember that life is short and true friends are hard to find. Don't let small things turn into huge fights. Look at the argument from each other's perspective. We are so lucky to enjoy the lives that we have- so many others have it so much worse. People are dying from starvation around the world, and my friends are upset over a saved seat, an extra stage, some flowers that were dug up before their time. Doesn't that seem silly?

Monday, October 03, 2005

The Rest of the Story

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water
Jack fell down and broke his crown
And Jill came tumbling after.

Up got Jack, and home did trot
As fast as he could caper
He went to bed and bound his head
With vinegar and brown paper.
The root of this child's nursery rhyme is in France and the Jack and Jill referred to are Louis XVI who was beheaded (lost his crown) followed by his Queen Marie Antoinette (who came tumbling after). The words and lyrics were made more palatable for the nursery by giving it a happy ending and has further been altered by the passage of time - the actual beheadings occurred in 1793. The first publication date for the lyrics of this nursery rhyme is 1795 which tie-in with the history and origins.

Saturday, October 01, 2005

Yard Sale Hell

Today was the Historic Conley Hills Neighborhood Association's neighborhood yardsale. About 15 homes within a two mile radius had yardsales today. Beverly & I filled my front yard with stuff that we no longer wanted (ok, I have to admit that I still wanted some of it, but I was trying to make a few bucks!). We had a pretty good turnout- it would've been better if the yardsale signs had actually pointed in the vicinity of my house, but I'm not complaining. I could've put up my own signs, but I didn't think about it. We got rid of a lot of stuff, and had a couple of boxes of stuff leftover that we'll donate to the hurricane relief group that's taking up collections for those that evacuated to Atlanta. I made almost $100-- just enough to get my phone service restored! I wish it was extra money, but it'll all go to paying one past-due bill.

Kitty brought me and Beverly coffee and breakfast sandwichs from Krystals. Bruce brought us some pumpkin cake. I didn't get to taste the cake yet, but I'm sure it'll be great. After all, Bruce is the best baker that I know, and I work in a Bakery!

Popsickle (the little girl from across the street) poked her head through her screened door as I was setting things up. I heard a few "heys!" from her, and a couple of "where's your dogs at?". Later she came over (carrying a neon green toothbrush, instead of a melting popsickle this time), and found a Barbie doll that she liked. She batted those little brown eyes at me and I couldn't resist- she went home carrying a free Barbie doll, and her toothbrush.

My last customers kind of freaked me out. They were a loving couple-- they held hands when they walked up the street to my house. Maybe I'm just jealous! Their names were Preston and Susan. God I hope they never read this, but I feel pretty secure in the fact that they don't have a computer in their home. Preston actually came to the yard sale earlier in the day. He bought 2 CDs: Bryan Adams, & Brian Setzer Orchestra. I had a hard time concentrating while I took his money-- all I could notice was his nose hair-- the strands stuck out of his nose about 4" -- the hair reached his lips! Wouldn't he notice that when he looked in the mirror, or ate? Doesn't he have any friends or family that would say "Hey- trim your nose hair"?

Anyway.... he bought his CDs and left. But a couple of hours later he returned with his wife, Susan. Oh, poor Susan. Not only does she have to sleep with this man every night, she has to wake up with him, too. Not that she was a prize to begin with. She would be any dentist's wet dream-- there wasn't a tooth in her head that wasn't broken, chipped or decayed. As they thumbed through the CDs, Preston told me that he owns 300 CDs and then he began to list them for me: "Ozzy Osbourne, Willie Nelson, Tupac Shakur.....". Susan put down the Miller Lite glass that she had been admiring and reminded Preston that they didn't have that Tupac CD "no more"-- they had "gave" it away. Preston didn't miss a beat and told me that he still had a CD that wasn't by Tupac, but someone similar. Then he continued to recite the other 297 CD's that he owned-- ending with Bryan Adams and Brian Setzer Orchestra that he had recently purchased (at my yardsale).

Preston bought an EnVogue CD; Susan boght that glamorous Miller Lite glass that she so admired. They joined hands and went their merry way towards their mirrorless home. Hopefully they stopped by one of the other 14 yardsales and purchased a nose-hair clipper, tweezers or scissors; but I doubt it.

I guess the most disturbing thought I have is that they are at home now, listening to EnVogue's "Don't Let Go" and making sweet love. Again, maybe I'm just being catty and I'm jealous of the love that they share- but dear sweet Jesus, I have one prayer: please don't let them procreate tonight while listening to my CD!